Guy Branum is a middle-aged, clinically obese homosexual confronting science and God to determine if there’s any actual purpose to his existence. His new comedy tour, Be Fruitful, arrives at Seattle’s Here-After club in The Crocodile, nestled in Belltown, on May 21st, and at Portland’s Mississippi Studios on May 22nd.
Branum is a comedian, writer, and actor known for his sharp wit and incisive cultural commentary. A former writer for Chelsea Lately and head writer of Totally Biased with W. Kamau Bell, Branum blends intelligence with humor, often exploring politics, pop culture, and LGBTQ+ issues. He created and hosted Talk Show the Game Show on truTV and is the author of the memoir My Life as a Goddess, which reflects his experiences growing up gay and intellectual in a small town. With a law degree and a comedy career, Branum stands out as a unique and insightful voice in entertainment.
I chatted with Guy on Zoom—here are the highlights.
Back in the PNW:
I really, really love the Pacific Northwest. There’s such a good comedy scene up there. You know, the festivals — going to Bridgetown, going to Bumbershoot — have always been such a great connection.
I actually did the Seattle Comedy Competition like 10 years ago. And while I lost, it was a great opportunity to just drive all around Washington. And then, like, 13 years ago, I had a run of college shows in the Pacific Northwest, so I really just spent two months driving around Washington, Portland, Idaho — and a little bit of Colorado, actually. I’ve been part of both the Bridgetown Comedy Festival and the… Portland Queer Comedy Festival.
On Current Tour:
So the show is me taking a journey through religion and science to figure out whether there’s a reason for gay people or fat people to exist — to understand whether I am a genetic or, you know, existential mistake. With lots of diversions, tangents, and segues and that kind of thing. But the main thrust is just: is there a purpose to existence when you’re not going to participate in evolution and there isn’t really a philosophy that encompasses you? And it’s also about trying to figure out how we tell stories about people we haven’t told stories about before.
And then also, there are roast jokes about fruit.
There is one very brief political mention — I sort of talk about J.D. Vance’s “childless cat lady” comment and the way we, you know… I mean, I’m basically talking about the fact that my argument is: LGBTQ+ — and people are always like, “What does the plus stand for?” — and I maintain that the plus stands for the people who are conditionally queer under some circumstances. Like childless cat ladies. Or straight guys who like attention too much. Or ladies who are too loud at brunch.
Yeah, I’d say my show isn’t largely about electoral politics, but it is inherently political to ask about the ways our society prioritizes and centers some people. And also about how gay people have really gotten to this point — there’s something beautiful about being unknowable and in the shadows.
There’s something, especially for gay men of my age, who may have some nostalgia for a world where we were less accepted but more wild and magical. And it’s me trying to figure out how I fit in a world where a place has been found for us — but that place is often just within a heterosexual framework. And we have to pretend like that works. Or like that’s enough.
But it’s also a really fun and funny show that’s ultimately happy and positive. Redemptive. I think comedy’s job is to find a path toward a happy ending.
And I think in so many ways — I mean, people think political comedy is about being negative or ironic or pessimistic. Like there’s some sort of nobility in pessimism. Like there’s nobility in making a joke about how the world is melting. And it’s like — no. You have to find a path toward a laugh.
You have to find a path toward some degree of hope or beauty. And I think it’s incumbent upon all of us to be figuring a way out of this. Saying, “Yeah, we know the current situation is bad.” But we have to find a path out.
On Starring in and Co-Producing Bros:
I was in Bros. I was a co-producer on Bros. It was a really great experience, just because it was an entirely queer cast. And it was just a vibe and an energy that I’ll probably professionally never have again.
It was really great. And Nick, our director — who is a straight man, with like three daughters, so you know… deeply heterosexual — was such an attentive student of queer culture. He was just trying to learn so much. It was great.
On Luke and Billy:
I mean, it was really, really lovely. The great thing about being a co-producer was that I was there every day to help write jokes and stuff. So I got to be really comfortable.
The days when I was acting kind of felt like a day off. Billy was already a really good friend of mine — and former boss — and just a person I really love and appreciate collaborating with. And Luke is just the kindest, nicest Boy Scout of a human being.
Like, Luke is what every gay guy was pretending to be in 2005. Earnest, strong, loves building things — and it all seems kind of fake, and then you’re like, “Oh, no, this is who that guy is.” He has an amazing new show where he brings all that together doing home renovations. I really love seeing someone able to bring all the things they’re good at into one space.
Wonderful. And he also has an adorable daughter named Tess now, with his partner. Except they’re both masculine gay guys, so I’m like, “I’m gonna need to buy that baby an Easter dress.” It always comes around that they’re great dads, but some of the dumb stuff you need to do with a two-year-old daughter… they let it slip their minds.
On Working on Chelsea Lately:
Working on Chelsea Lately was an amazing first real opportunity in the business. Before that, I had worked at a little cable network about video games. But it was amazing.
One of the first times I opened for Chelsea was on a trip up to Seattle and Portland. It was also one of my first flights on a private jet. And there’s nothing more horrifying than realizing that with a private jet, Portland is 40 minutes from Los Angeles. You just drive up, get on the plane, get off. It was lovely.
On Mindy Kaling:
Mindy is such a great creative genius and also a mogul. Watching those things in tandem is dazzling and impressive. She knows the business of television, and she knows the art of television writing so intimately — I learned so much from her.
I really appreciate it. And watching the way she balances concern for getting something made and making something good has always impressed me. I’m a big fan. She keeps it going. She also has a family and so many business ventures going — it’s impressive to see how she balances it all.
Oh, He Also Has a Law Degree:
Yeah, I went to law school at the University of Minnesota Law School — just because I didn’t know what I wanted to do after college. And my mom told me to go to law school. She was very emphatic about it. And I was like, “OK, I guess.”
Oh yeah — and I was still in the closet. (You had a Jewish mother, right?) Yes.
But I was still in the closet. And going to law school and realizing that I wasn’t on the path I needed to be on — that really pushed me to come out of the closet and realize I wanted to be a comedian. Going in the wrong direction helped me realize what the right direction should be.
And that was really great for me. It’s also helpful when I’m frustrated or annoyed with things the current president is doing.
Advice for Young Comedians:
There are so many good young queer comedians now — the world has changed. In my career, we’ve gone from a time when there were always great queer comedians, but nowhere for them to go.
There was no success to be had. Even when you had some degree of success, you never got to make it big. Like, Robin Williams did so much to promote Marga Gomez back in the ’90s, and the industry just didn’t know what to do with her. She had to build her own career.
But now you look at people like Sam Taggart, Sam Jay, Nori Reed, Robin Tran — and it’s really exciting.
So, my advice to young queer comedians is: go to places where people will get all your jokes. And go to places where people have never thought about your life or perspective. Figure out how to make all of those audiences love you.
There’s nothing better than performing for an audience full of queer people and ladies who get it. But there’s also something beautiful about helping people think about a world outside their own.
Be brave. Have a good time. We’re gay people — we’ve always had a good time.
Within queer politics, some people want to do this respectability thing, where we’re supposed to divorce nightlife and fucking and all the fun stuff from our political struggle. But that’s not who we are.
We are not a people who have organized in churches. We are not a people who have organized in fields. We are a people who have organized in the places where we fuck — because that’s where we come together.
For queer people, fun and politics must always be in the same place.
And Then There Was the April 4th Episode of Jeopardy! (Not Celebrity Jeopardy!):
Yes, I lost. I lost in a barn burner. A very close game.
There was a returning champion. He came in third, and I came in second. If this guy Mike Dawson from Portland had answered Final Jeopardy! incorrectly, I would have been the champion. But Mike is coming to my show, and I will fight him afterward. Wonderful.
Also, it was an extreme situation — not only was Mike quicker on the buzzer than me, he’s also larger than I am. A very strange situation. I’d say it was the most trivia talent by weight that the Jeopardy! stage may have ever seen.
Ken Jennings — a former Seattleite — is a delight. He’s very lovely. Though he did express some frustration that I was on regular Jeopardy! and not Celebrity Jeopardy! And I was like, “Yes, if they booked me for Celebrity Jeopardy!, I would have done it.”
See Guy Branum’s ‘Be Fruitful’ at Seattle’s Here-After on May 21st @ 7pm. Click HERE for Tix.
OR
See Guy at Portland’s Mississippi Studios on May 22nd @ 7pm. Click HERE for Tix.
